And another thing.

Right-ho Universe, would it be possible to let Freda Fretter understand, why every single time that Baggy feels that her life is on some kind of sensible even keel, it's necessary to chuck in a curve-ball? Was it something she said? Or did? Or maybe it's just to keep her on her toes.

The latest, curve-ball:

Having had an eye test two weeks ago, to be told that Baggy does have the cataract that she had previously been told by a different optician, that she didn't have (really, "Shouldn't have gone to" a certain optician! This one is soooooooo much more thorough), Baggy was back yesterday for further checks. Bit of stuff dropped in the eye to dilate the pupil so that the optician could make sure that there was nothing else going on, before he referred Baggy for cataract surgery. No problem, Baggy had been through this process once before, so wasn't worried.

'Open your eye wide. It will sting for a bit.'
'Okay, fine,' thought Freda, 'but why is he doing the right eye, when the cataract is in the left one?'
'I'll take a look at both eyes, while I can.'

In fact he spent considerably longer on the right eye than the left one, as Freda tried not to panic, and Hormonal Hannah gave Baggy a hot flush. Clever Bird attempted to get Baggy to relax, which seemed to make things worse - at one point Baggy's chin, which was resting on the weird contraption that kept her head still, was literally chattering uncontrollably, bashing her newly goofy teeth onto each other. (Old age seems to have caused Baggy's lower jaw to recede).

Eventually, after what seemed an age, the various tests were finished. 'So, how's it all looking?' asked a worried Baggy.
'Well, as we discussed you do have a cataract which will benefit from surgery.' (Yes). 'Ordinarily, a cataract tends to develop on the outer rim of the iris moving inwards, but yours has started in the middle of the lens and is moving outwards, hence why your vision is so blurred.' (Typical). 'Surgery may not necessarily correct your sight in that eye because it's always been a weaker eye, has it not? But it will get rid of the haze, and should improve it a little.' (Right, okay). 'But you also have a small bleed from the optic nerve in your right eye.' (Urmmm). 'So I'd  just like to redo the pressure tests.' (Great - scary puffs of air on the eyeballs). 

Baggy tried not to pull away from the puffs. 'Well that's completely normal.' (Phew!) 'I will need to refer you to a specialist Optometrist to investigate the bleed though, as a precaution.'

Freda could take no more, so Clever Bird chipped in, 'What exactly does the optic nerve do?'
'It sends messages to the brain.'
'Well, that sounds fairly important!'
'Yes, so of course any damage to it is of concern. Have you ever been told you have problems with your sugar levels? (No) Or been ill? (Severe anaemia) Or had a trauma to your eyes or head? (No)

No. No - who are you kidding you idiot? Grotty Groom has had concussion four times and had to see an Optometrist after one fall, but of course Hormonal Hannah forgot to mention any of that.

Or high blood pressure?' (No, well yes, frequently, but not diagnosed).

'So what do you think it is?'
'Damage to the nerve would indicate Glaucoma.'
'That's a scary word.'
'It is, but we are just checking at this stage and as your eye pressure is normal and your peripheral vision is perfect in that eye (Thanks Wessles), it might be something else.'
'Like what?'
'That's why we will get it checked by a specialist.' (Hmmm, not sharing now then.)
'Okay thanks.'
'Try not to worry, there is treatment for Glaucoma, usually in the form of eye drops, or possibly they'll recommend surgery.'
(Oh marvellous, let's try to get Miss Anxiety not to worry about something she can genuinely worry about then. Sigh).

As Baggy explained all of this to Calum, looking like she was on drugs her pupils were so wide, it occurred to Clever Bird that the requirement for the extra tests had been absolutely nothing to do with the cataract, they were because the optician had spotted the optic nerve damage, but needed to get a closer look. And breathe...

So, thanks Universe, but Baggy will cope, whatever the outcome.  Freda Fretter would just like to request however that she doesn't have to wait too many months to find out how serious (or not) the problem is - thanking you ..........












Note to readers (my lovely Baggees): For the avoidance of any doubt - every character in this blog is me!!! No Baggy was harmed in its writing.

Baggy's daily state!
Depression (Black = really bad/Grey = not great/Blue = okay/Yellow = sunny day): Blue.
Anxiety (From 1 = barely any to 10 = gibbering wreck standard): 8. 
Tears: Well, yes.
Baggy: 215 - oh well.