Baggy's daily state!
Depression (Black = really bad/Grey = not great/Blue = okay/Yellow = sunny day): Grey.
Anxiety (From 1 = barely any to 10 = gibbering wreck standard): 5.
Tears: No.
Pancakes (Yes/No): Being well behaved - well until there was lemon drizzle cake at dog training!
Weight in her terrifying naked state (Stones and pounds): 😉.
Overall day: 🌈.
Clever Bird is not at all sure how to snap Hormonal Hannah out of her current state of mind. No she can't "snap" her out of depression. No she can't "snap" her out of anxiety. But she should be able to snap her out of her spending money she doesn't have. Okay, it's not like the old days when Hannah was completely out of control. She's discussed it before Baggees: lose a job - buy a sports car; have a messy break-up; buy a sheepskin coat; have a bad day at work - splurge out on an expensive holiday, or a new designer outfit, or some jewellery - regardless of whether she could afford it. No, it's not that bad this time. It's "just" tens of pounds, rather than thousands of pounds. And actually it's also (kind of), necessary purchases. The pooch needed to fit in properly with his hippy mum and dad, so Furry Mama ordered him a hand-knitted jumper from MakerMouse on Etsy. It arrived today. He does actually need it (well he doesn't, as he has coats), but his fur is very fine, so when he is in Billy Bob Jalopy campervan, he needs something to keep him warm. And frankly Furry Mama couldn't resist it!
And it worked its magic. It cheered Hannah up no end when it arrived - beautifully packaged and with a couple of doggy biscuits enclosed! Pepper knew it was for him.
Even Hannah was laughing at his antics to try and get in to the surprise biscuits!
He matches her baggy trousers beautifully!
And that of course is the other purchases - baggy trousers. The fact is that Baggy cannot get in her trousers. Not even her large bird trousers. And even though she's doing a good job of losing a few pounds, the only thing she's comfy in at present are her new winter baggy trousers. So last night she ordered two more pairs (from the sale). So, truthfully, she needed those as well really. And the good news is that they'll still fit her even if she does achieve her objective of losing her excess weight! But still. The guilt. It's probably all a symptom of her depression. It's definitely a cycle of feelings that Baggy is very familiar with:
Feel really low - buy something - feel really happy with the purchase - feel guilty about buying it - feel low - buy something..............
So let's do as yesterday's blog suggested and find the positive from this! Well actually Clever Bird realises that that is simple. On all three items, Baggy has actually spent less than she has earned from her own Etsy shop and her vintage cabinet this month. Hannah does feel happy with her purchases. And she is no worse off than before she made them - unlike in her previous pre-happy pills life when she'd put herself thousands of pounds in debt. Most importantly the pooch looks adorable, and even Hannah likes Baggy in her baggy outfits. So it's all good. Guilt. Pah! Nope, guilt gone! 😵
After lunch, Furry Mama dressed Baggy in her baggys and Pepper in his coordinated jumper and they went to dog training class. Now regular Baggees will have noticed just how much more confident the pooch has become. He demonstrated this admirably today. He went from model "obedience" dog, (because he was a very nervous rescue pooch who didn't want to leave his Mama), to confident puppy, who wanted to play with the other dogs, and hurtled around the hall with another "playful" dog, virtually knocking all the other dogs and owners flying! Sigh. 😳 But Clever Bird couldn't help feeling pleased that he looked so adorable in his new jumper, and that he was so clearly happy. Fortunately the trainer thought it was wonderful to see that Pepper had come so much out of his shell. He's so clever though, with a little help from Furry Mama, he instantly added two new commands to his repertoire, just from watching another dog!!
Baggy had to hang on to Billy Bob's steering wheel on the drive home, as they got buffeted by the wind. She came into the house to two new messages a) Creative Clara's Pelham puppets had sold at auction yesterday and b) there was another booking for the holiday cottage. Hannah felt better still!
Guilt all gone! Baggy may not contribute enough to the family coffers, but she does contribute something, and she's proud of it. The cottage is already booking up nicely for next year and she's intending to do more vintage fairs. Watch out Suffolk, Baggy's on a mission. Her mission for this evening, is to find her reading glasses! She has so far searched the entire house twice. No sign. Mind you it's hard when you can't see properly to search 😎. It has crossed Freda Fretter's mind, that she remembers Furry Mama seeing them on the coffee table and thinking that at least the pooch doesn't steal them any more....................
Baggy had to hang on to Billy Bob's steering wheel on the drive home, as they got buffeted by the wind. She came into the house to two new messages a) Creative Clara's Pelham puppets had sold at auction yesterday and b) there was another booking for the holiday cottage. Hannah felt better still!
Guilt all gone! Baggy may not contribute enough to the family coffers, but she does contribute something, and she's proud of it. The cottage is already booking up nicely for next year and she's intending to do more vintage fairs. Watch out Suffolk, Baggy's on a mission. Her mission for this evening, is to find her reading glasses! She has so far searched the entire house twice. No sign. Mind you it's hard when you can't see properly to search 😎. It has crossed Freda Fretter's mind, that she remembers Furry Mama seeing them on the coffee table and thinking that at least the pooch doesn't steal them any more....................
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