Note to readers (my lovely Baggees): For the avoidance of any doubt - every character in this blog is me!!! No Baggy was harmed in its writing.
Baggy's daily state!
Depression (Black = really bad/Grey = not great/Blue = okay/Yellow = sunny day):
Grey.
Anxiety (From 1 = barely any to 10 = gibbering wreck standard):
9.
Tears:
Cried dry.
Overall day(s):
Exhausting.
The seeming suddenness of beloved Minty Mutt's demise totally knocked Furry Mama and Calum for six. Having to make the devastating decision on Monday to stop his suffering, was made somewhat easier by the fact that by then, not only would he not eat, not even his favourite cheese, he just didn't seem to recognise Baggy or Calum. He didn't even respond to his own name. The poor lad was literally terrified while he was at the vets and wouldn't let them near him, but he also wouldn't come to Furry Mama for reassurance. It was awful. But hopefully he is now out of pain and romping around in Heaven with lots of new pals.
But the hole he has left is enormous. He will never be forgotten, and he will never be replaced, that just wouldn't be possible. However, the house without him in it, is suddenly not Baggy and Calum's house! It feels like Baggy's father's house once again. It is way too quiet and way too empty. Even with the television on and Hinge and Bracket cats (who are also missing Minty), looking for extra cuddles, it's weirdly quiet and "cold". Hormonal Hannah and Furry Mama just fell apart. It was all so sudden that it was a major shock, and it was clear that Hannah was going to drop into a bad cycle very quickly. Baggy could not stop crying. And to be honest baggees, Calum wasn't much better. Mint was
always there. Even when he was fast asleep behind the sofa, he snuffled and snored and leapt about in his sleep. He got up to check no one had left the room. He came for cuddles. If either cat jumped on Furry Mama, he instantly came to shoo them off her and get his pat. Put your shoes on - he expected a walk. Put the bins out - he leapt about and barked. Go into the garden - he followed you. Get some cheese out of the fridge - he was there! Sit down at the dining table for supper - he lay next to you. Move rooms - he came as well. Try to leave - he blocked you. Just always there. Now he's not and it's just not right.
He was put to sleep at lunchtime on Monday. When they got home Furry Mama literally couldn't cope. Truthfully, Mint's death has affected her more badly than Baggy's father's death. Hannah took Baggy to bed and she slept for five hours. Then she couldn't be in the house, so she persuaded Calum to go to Southwold with her. They went to the harbour pub (that they took Mint to a few times) and had fish and chips and a sausage for Mint. Plus Hannah had a very large glass of wine. But Hannah still didn't want to go home (to her safe place - that now felt far from safe without Mint), so they went and sat on the beach in the pitch black, with Southwold lighthouse sweeping its light over them every few seconds. Furry Mama had a paddle in Mint's honour. Eventually they had to go home.
Hannah went back to her refuge - bed. Despite sleeping for five hours earlier in the day, she instantly fell asleep. Badly and with lots of wakefulness, bad dreams and tears, but she slept. Tuesday was ghastly. Hannah can't remember it really. Just lots of crying and feeling lost. Meanwhile Calum, was also not coping very well. Bless him, he had managed to take the week off to look after Baggy so that she wouldn't be on her own. He started looking at rescue dogs. Hannah wasn't amused. No way was Furry Mama even considering getting another dog. But Calum kept looking. As he did, Clever Bird thought about Hannah, who was already making Baggy take to her bed. Her anxiety levels were at "panic attack" level. When Calum went back to work, what would Hannah do? Stay in bed? Possibly. Stay in the house? Almost certainly. The only thing keeping Baggy going recently has been the need to get Furry Mama out with Minty Mutt. Clever Bird joined Freda Fretter in worrying about Baggy's depression coming back with a vengeance. "Which rescue site are you looking at?"
"RSPCA. Look how cute he is".
There are hundreds of dogs needing homes. Every size, shape, breed, age, colour imaginable. Very sad. Lots of gorgeous cute ones. Furry Mama got side-tracked admiring them. But kept seeing Alsations and getting even more upset.
In the middle of the night, as Hannah got Baggy up to go to the bathroom, Furry Mama checked where Mint was laying so that she could step over him, then burst into tears when she realised that he wasn't there. Clever Bird tried to imagine another dog on Mint's bed that was still at the end of their bed - she couldn't. Baggy went and got headache pills and went back to bed. She couldn't sleep. Maybe, just maybe, Clever Bird could imagine another dog at the end of the bed. Baggy slept. On Wednesday both Furry Mama and Calum were looking at rescue dogs on the internet. "Shall we go and see a few?" asked Calum.
Baggy's heart rate rose. Furry Mama burst into tears - again. Clever Bird pointed out to Baggy that Hannah was getting more stroppy, anxious, tearful and panicky by the minute. Maybe she should think about it. What's the harm in looking? She needed to get out of he house anyway!
"Okay, I suppose we could".
Except that when they checked, pretty much every large rescue charity is closed all day Wednesday. Then they spotted an individual one. In Norfolk. Actually, only twenty-minutes away. They only had six dogs on their website, but by now Clever Bird was more convinced that Furry Mama needed doggy cuddles and to get out of the "empty" house.
When they found the centre in the most beautiful location, they were rather surprised that if the frantic barking was anything to go by, there were more than six dogs there. In fact there were probably about two dozen. Stunning greyhounds. Lovely staffies. Bouncy terriers. Sweet lurchers. Little mongrels. And, the first dog that Furry Mama spotted, as a little black nose shoved through the bars to sniff Baggy's hand! There were names and brief notes on every cage. Nearly every dog could not be with cats. This one could, he had lived with a cat. Every dog was frantically barking. This one wasn't. A lot of the dogs were elderly. Not this one, he was only ten months old. Many were huge. Not this one, but he wasn't too small either. Some were terrified. Not this one though, he was friendly. Some were going demented, trying to get a stroke and get out of their cage. Not this one, he was very calm, just stood up and shoved his nose through the bars. Furry Mama was smitten. So was Calum.
They asked to meet him and were told they could take him for a little walk. The moment he left his cage, he was on a mission to escape to the freedom of the lovely green common. Quite strong. Very quick. Over bouncy. Totally focussed on everything except the humans. By now Furry Mama was in love. Calum was grinning. Chats followed. A "Reserved" sign was put on his door! Meet Pepper baggees.
Well actually his name is Luke, but Calum and Furry Mama don't think he's a Luke, so they will be renaming him if everything goes according to plan. He is a ten-month old Labrador/Border Collie cross and he arrived at the centre as an "emergency" at the weekend. Clever Bird is well aware that he is going to be a handful, but Baggy needs a challenge to keep Hannah from taking the gang over again. Lots of walks; training classes; maybe even agility classes - that will get Baggy fitter! But more to the point, it will get her out of the house! And having a life. And not falling apart at the seams because losing her constant companion is so hard. Soon she will have a new constant companion. He also has issues! Like Baggy, he has major separation anxiety, so they can work on that together!
Furry Mama and Calum went to see him again today. Baggy was actually so excited that she was awake and wanting to get up at 3.00am! She was actually up at 8.30am and put The Domestic Goddess to work getting the house ready for a "home inspection". So instead of Furry Mama feeling as though she was "clearing out" Minty's things, she felt as though she was preparing for Pepper! Minty would have approved. They were at the rescue centre for 11.00am and took Pepper out. Well a kennel staff lady did, without even letting Furry Mama and Calum say "Hello", but Clever Bird realised that she didn't know that they had come yesterday. But what was really lovely was that Pepper recognised them and was desperate to say "Hi". After a while the kennel lady gave the lead to Calum. Cal immediately made a fuss of him, as did Furry Mama. Then he set off again. Furry Mama took over. A few "ahhhhs" and Pepper understood not to pull. Teaching him to heal should be no problem. Freda Fretter had the worry that he had no training, but when Furry Mama asked him to "sit", it was instant! Bless him. The notes said he was "stubborn and unbiddable", even the rescue centre owner said that she hadn't found this to be true, Furry Mama certainly didn't!
When they got back after a short walk a) he's a puppy b) he's just been neutered and is swollen and bruised, Calum asked if they could just sit with him for a while. They could. Furry Mama tried a few new things. He ignored "Luke". Instantly responded to Pepper! He understands "touch". He understood "leave" and "stay" when dogs went past. Apparently he has no recall, but Clever Bird knows he'll soon get it - the lad is a genius! Yes baggees they both already love the lad, and he so deserves a break!
Creative Clara asked to take a few photos (cameras are banned), it was okay, so Baggy went back to Billy Bob to get her camera. Apparently, Pepper didn't stop looking for her! These photos are as she returned! He was soon put back in his cage sadly.
But tomorrow, Calum is off on a bike rally for the weekend, and after Grotty Groom has been to see her Boys, Furry Mama will go to visit Pepper - with a new leather collar, treats and food :) She hopes to get the home inspection sorted and take over his ownership in the next few days, even though he won't be able to come home until his swelling has gone down, in another week or so, if she owns him a) Freda Fretter can stop worrying that something might go wrong and he won't be the new furry of the family and b) she can take him for walks on his own. Either way Baggy is excited to be going over to see him every day until he (hopefully) comes home with them. Baggy actually wants to go out. Calum and Furry Mama are very excited. Clever Bird is sure that it's a good decision for Hormonal Hannah. It's definitely a good decision for Pepper.............
